Hanging By A Moment ...

My mom loves this picture above of Levi and Arnold yesterday, she said it should be a Hallmark card. They are such nuts! This is how they play ... mouths wide open and teeth showing but they never hurt each other ... ahh the life of a dog. So today is Friday ... whoo hoo! Only one more week and its Christmas vacation time :) On my way back from lunch I heard an awesome set of songs on the XM radio (which almost never happens mid-day). One of them being the heading of this post, Lifehouse's Hanging By a Moment. This was the first song phil sent to me in an e-card, I guess for a while I would of considered it our "song". It's not a sappy love song by all means but everytime I hear it I realize how perfect it was for the time. And also how perfect it can be for life, as we're all really hanging by moments. Moments when we'll see our loved ones again, moments when we get to escape from work ... moments that lead up to the fun that weekends hold. I try not to fill my blog up with sad stuff, as its much more fun to post fun pictures and good stories, but this is my journal so its my therapy I guess. Yesterday was a tough day ... the morning was frusterating trying to work a new program we have at work. I wasn't totally lost, I just wasn't as fast as I used to be in finding buttons and moving around the contracts. I ended up finding my "tools" that happened to be right in front of my face ... whoops. The afternoon some bad news came up about my mom and again I feel the struggles of not being home. I know I can't single handidly fight my moms cancer but it would be nice to just be there ... for a hug, for a talk, for help. These are the times when I miss my family the most. We're such a tight knit family and I hate to be on the "outside" looking in. Yesterday was one of those days where I thought about packing a bag and just driving home, because when its my mom or my dad I just feel like they're #1 no matter what. I have to ask myself why on earth do I live so far away. But I'm thankful to have such an understanding husband to come home too and let me cry on his shoulder and get lost in a hug, and I'm thankful for Levi who not matter what can always make me smile and forces me to go for a walk when I want to crawl up on the couch and eat cookies! I can at least have some piece that I'll be home in a week, and I'm counting down the days. I'm so glad Phil was able and willing to take so much time off from work, he has no idea how much it means to me to spend all that time with my family. It's something I probably took for granted all those christmas breaks in college that felt like forever and a day away from my friends. Today I'm doing alright, and hoping that the next week goes by fast, and before I know it we'll be hitting the open road with a trunk full of presents :) I know this is just another bump in the road, but I just wish that my mom didn't have to tackle so many bumps ... I keep thinking she's had enough of this and I wish it would just go away forever. One day at a time and hopefully one day close to a cure.